Today I woke up upset. Very upset. Crying. I got taken out separately for a cigarette and didn’t want to talk to anyone. I couldn’t make eye contact. At dinner a pregnant girl from the ward downstairs sat next to me but I found it too distressing and ran off.
Patient A poured a bottle of water all over the communal table with my friend’s phone and tobacco on. I flipped. Over the last few days I’ve slowly lost the plot with her bullying. I called her an evil c**t and threw a cup of water at her. I told her she was the reason people in this country look down on those with genuine mental health issues. She has capacity to lie. She doesn’t like attention not being on her.
My moods steadily picked up throughout the day by watching the football and surrounding myself with the company of my fellow “nutcrackers” (they just named themselves that for this!) We’re all sat now listening to music and having a good chat.